Mr Meaty #2
26 January 2009
Pinning down what it means to be a bloke (MAN) gets more and more difficult especially for Christian blokes. Here's a helpful collection of thoughts I've been sitting on for while now.
Stuart Scott writes
Stuart Scott writes
Though culture is pushing for unisex everything, men and women need be careful that they are distinguishably different from the opposite sex in appearance, mannerisms, and cultural concepts of appropriate gender behavior. Some men might need help to recognize and change effeminate habits, which they have inadvertently developed.Douglas Wilson writes:
All men should fervently seek to pursue a true and life-changing understanding of the basic characteristics of man and Christ, take to heart specific biblical charges to men, and look for opportunities to lead, love, protect, and provide. Then, he will be a real man.
We have lost an understanding of imitative masculinity. Because of this, our boys veer into one of two ditches. Either they embrace humility without boldness which in boys is effeminate, or they embrace boldness without humility which is destructive.John Benton writes:
There is need for repentance. Perhaps single men have used the strength they have to serve themselves rather than other people. Perhaps husbands have used their strength to dominate their wives and children. We need to learn to come back to God, back to his Word of Scripture, and learn again to walk with him. To be a loving sacrificial servant of others, as Jesus Christ was, is not to be namby-pamby. It is to be a true man.John Piper writes,
At the heart of mature masculinity is a sense of benevolent responsibility to lead, provide for and protect women in ways appropriate to a mans differing relationships.
tags christian, linkage, ministry tips, thinking
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Scott's comments are ridiculous. Why on earth do we need to distinguish ourselves according to some arbitrary cultural standard? Is being a Man or a Woman a case of following a cliche? And which cliche? Is there some Right culture we need to copy masculinity and femininity from? To such people whatever the current culture is seems to always be the wrong one.
Benton's comments are much better, and make Scott's comments look shallow and foolish.
I'm sure we'll disagree but he'd (and I'd) argue that passages such as 1 Peter 3, Colossians 3, Ephesians 5, 1 Cor 11 teach these sort of biblical cultural standards. (perhaps what they look like practically varies).
I agree with you that Christians are often quick to write off the importance of the current culture. we must get better at listening to our world.
However I believe you can hold a biblical conservative view of gender roles, while still valuing other aspects of current culture.
Thanks for your comment.
I love the word "bloke" and all its derivatives. It's a crying shame that Americans don't use it.
What I would ask Stuart Scott is how do we help men act manly in their *ahem* MANnerisms? I have a friend who is a computer tech guy, a big burly dude, but he highlights and flat-irons his hair. Every time I see him I want to walk up to him and go, "Dude. NO."
AND, my other issue is, is there not room in the spectrum of Christian manliness for a guy who's not into sport, who doesn't like ultimate fighting, who actually enjoys writing music and drinking lattes? Do we have to make every dude a Wild at Heart, mountain climbing, chest-thumping macho man? Or what.
BTW, not saying this is your position, it's just something I come across -- a general frustration.
I agree with Laura... but extrapolate the IT bloke.... that doesn't phase me at all to be honest. I'm a girl and I'm a physicist. I don't actually work with any gay, or even overly effeminate guys, but seriously, the less real traditional "blokey" blokes around the better. I want to be able to work in a place without a gender balance of workers without my sexuality being an issue. To me it does not matter than I am a girl and they are boys. I don't want it to matter to them. There is nothing worse than IT guys that think computers are a blokes domain and that girls don't know what they're doing (or even worse, have no right to be there). It's not cool. And that is not being a Christian man at all, but it's what happens.
To this end, I don't agree with Mike on the gender roles issue, and I'm not going to argue, I just disagree. I can't help that I have what you might call a "boys brain", and I don't want to be tied to the kitchen doing stuff I hate and am useless at when my gifts are elsewhere. I can only use the gifts God gave me, and that's more than my gender.
I also like what Benton says.
Hi Claire :)
I don't think anyone here or for that matter any of the fellas Mike quoted would disagree with your statement.
Mike's not the sort to think that in order to be a manly man of God that you have to stand when you pee, hunt, fish, and watch football and eat a bucket full of chicken wings. (I've actually heard people who say that sort of stuff tho, and it's ridiculous ... one of my professors actually named his son Hunter).
And he certainly isn't the type to think that in order for a woman to be feminine she must know less than he does about technology (who do you think introduced him to various programs that help his life run smoothly now? ... ;), or sport (he LOVES that I learn what I can about Australian sports), or knows more about cooking, etc.
Rather, I know for certain that when Stuart Scott lays out what a manly man is ... he goes straight to the example of Jesus (in his book titled Exemplary Husband) not culture and chicken wings.
hey Christine
Hehe, glad to hear it!
Thanks for your reply :)
I know Mike's a great bloke, I'm not questioning whether he thinks those things!
You certainly can go to far, though (HUNTER???!), and I also know Jesus doesn't have a problem with girls... just want any guys who think it MIGHT be okay to consider a girl less because she's a girl, it's not okay. And not WJWD :)
Thanks again!
:)